Learning demands time off!

As i was driving around Flatbush yesterday on my day off, I happened to pass by some Yeshivas. I was remembering what it was like not to be off for a legal holiday or even Sundays. Now, I dont know what i would do if I didnt have that day once a week to wake up late and relax. I remember by sundays begining at 7.30 and ending at 3.00. That is almost a full day of work. Strict yeshivish yeshivas are so against their boys ever having time off. I remember dreading it everyday of the week of every month. Which, of course, caused me to come late on shabbos morning davening so I can have that once a week feeling of waking up a little late.

The Rabbis used to always tell us 'there is no time off from learning'. I hate the say this, sometimes one needs a day or two to to recuperate after putting 40 hours of learning in a week. I used to look forward to the few times a year, we were completely off. They think they are being nice by letting us out at 3.00 on Memorial day. What the hell can i do that late. Let alone, my HS was about 45 minutes away from my house. I'm glad those years are over. I have no idea how I would be able to handle that these days.

Shavuos is for sleeping.

Is it wrong of me to look forward to this holiday so I can catch up on my sleep? In fact, I remember last year being the first year in a really long time that I didn’t stay up on Shavuos night and I remember having one the best nights sleep. I have no idea why. I remember the years I actually did stay up all night, I barely learnt 30 minutes through out the night. I enjoyed it because it was a great social gathering and get to meet up with my buddies and catch up on good old times, but then, by the end of the night, I always felt very unproductive as if I wasted my night away doing nothing and of course really tired. The best part of my night was when i came home and layed down and was out cold as soon as my head hit the pillow.

I notice that’s what most young people in Flatbush do that anyways, stay up all night for the sake of it. They barely learn an hour then hang around the coffee and donut stations gossiping about life for the rest of the night. I love the people that stay out all night to hang around outside smoking and make their shabuos night crawl from shul to shul and see what kind of goodies their offering.

At least last year I attempted to learn for an hour so i can be aware of what’s going on, despite being overly tired from putting in a full day of work,. So, I went to my shul, got some goodies, then sat down and tried to listen to a shiur. Ten minutes in, having not really listened all that much and I all was thinking about was my bed. So it got me thinking, I could be home sleeping. I book out and was back home in my bed with in 15 minutes – best shavous ever. Maybe that’s what I need, a really boring shiur at 12 a clock to really get me tired and all set for sleep at 12.30. Bring it on..

Roommate approval after only two dates?

I recently went out with a girl for a third date. The first 2 dates went sort of well, but fun nevertheless enough for a 3rd I think. Then came the 3rd and for some reason the plan was changed to meet by her apartment with her roommate still being there. She would be there of the remainder of the time and was with us when we went a local concert (which was not planned). The plan was to hang out at the apt with both girls. Now, am I crazy for thinking that was strange? Is she trying to get roommate approval after only 2 dates? I hardly know the girl im going out with and here I am talking it up with the roommate, who I must say was also pretty attractive. Naturally things didn’t work out after, as I felt really uncomfortable being put into this kind of situation.

How was I suppose to be all close and huddly cuddly with the girl I was currently going out with only meeting her twice before. Rather, I ended up having casual small talk with both the roomie and her. It also felt like a date with both of them that went horribly wrong. Is this normal procedure, have I missed something. I can see maybe after 10 dates when we are both comfortable with each other that she wants her dating partner to meet her friends and vice versa, not two. How would she like it if I took my friend along and went all went out together?

Maybe, other people can feel comfortable after 2 dates, but I need a lot longer to really feel cool with meeting her hot roommate. If she wasn’t up for another date, she shouldn’t have gone out again. I guess it was poor judgment on her part.

Extravagant friday night Bar Mitzvah

I guess bar mitzvahs have changed since my days of actively attending them back when I was 13. I was at a relative’s bar mitzvah this past shabbos, and all I can say is that are many other ways to spend excess money. First I thought when some one makes the main event on a Friday night; the family was trying to save money by not having it on a weeknight. They get to save on expenses like photography and musicians. Oh, was I so wrong. Indeed, they did hire a photographer before shabbos as well as hiring 3 chasideshe guys to sing acapella during the meal. That Williger guy was there singing, but ive been told he was there as friend and wasn’t getting paid.

As I walked into the main hall which looked liked more like an ice bar with blue glowing stands, than a bar mitzvah reception, along with the 250 other guests, we were greeted by 42 waiters in crisp dry cleaned jackets all standing in synch, with the fancy dishes and way to many silverware to count. All I can think is, damn, there are a lot of waiters here. Eventually I got accustomed to the abundance of waiters; I was all set for the food. We started off with this huge square piece of gefilte fish wrapped up like a gift box with a bow (made out of celery) and flower on top. I must say, the fish was pretty good and that was just the beginning. Oh, let talk about the drinks for a bit. So, everyone got those vintage 8 ounce glass bottles of coke instead of the normal 2 litter bottle for the table. That’s not all; I was worried once I had one, that was it. Each time I polished one down, within 2 minutes the waiter swapped it with a new bottle. So the soup and main course was the regular food you have in most places, but then they came around with spare ribs. Now that’s what im talking about. Oh, and then of course the 3 options of desert, which was awesome.
The next morning, I along, with some other people I had spoken with had some stomach issues. That didn’t stop me from eating at the Kiddush, which was way out of control. Im talking about the 20 minute wait for the cholent, kugal, corn beef, and pieces of tongue, six flavors of herring with the coolest guys of flatbush And may I add they catered a fine selection of liquor for these hockers (although I downed a shot or 2 myself). I stuck around for lunch, was pretty nice, but nothing that wasn’t mentioned already (8 ounce soda bottles and 3 different types of schnitzel). All I can say, that was one of those extravagant bar mitzvahs I have ever attended, maybe im just not as classy as some people, especially for a bar mitzvah that took place Friday night.

Frum girls - Dress like its almost summer!

Ok, beautiful frum girls. The weather is spectacular outside and spring shopping is full swing. You see all the non jews and non religious women? They dress appropriate for this time of year. Their sleeves on their shirts get shorter (if any at all), skirts go higher, and they wear brighter colors with cooler and thinner material. You know why? Because it gets nasty hot outside. Frum people have to be different. They have to be uncomfortable and lack any sense of style. They have to wear long sleeves and extra long skirts with really thick material, while sweating their ass’s off. I don’t want to hear that as jew we cant act like the goyim. G-d forbid girls have a sense of fashion. Learn from the non-frummies, there’s a reason that they change their dress code this time of year.

I really admire their uniqueness, creativity, and common sense. Don’t you girls want to look prettier? You don’t want to scare away people. It can even boost your self confidence. Now, how about showing some skin!

My Israel day parade/ concert recap

I stand by my previous post: the parade is so much more worthwhile than the concert. Maybe I just enjoy walking block to block watching different floats and disorganized marchers. Or maybe it’s those talented black kids with their marching bands. I guess Jewish kids can’t drum like black folks, let alone march in synch. Regardless, the parade was much more fun than the concert. Like 3.30 or so, I began making my way into the park. Snaking around this path, with absolutely zero security, we entered the closed off concert area. The music was half mediocre, I guess, the best jewish music is ever going to get along with the wonderful Zionist and ‘lets get Olmert the hell out of office’ speeches.

As I made my rounds through the crowds of fellow jews, I met some friends, and people I haven’t seen in a while. That was all fun, but all I can say, thank g-d I didn’t burst out a craving to have some Dougies. Have you seen that line? That was longer than a ladies bathroom line at Yankees stadium. Half the damn concert was on queue, and probably spent the entire time waiting. I have a question: why can’t they get more vendors? Is it because Dougies can buy out the rights to be the only kosher stand there therefore causing hundreds (maybe thousands) have to suffer? They should have had more vendors. I guess this is where Dougies gets most of their income from, due to all their stores are closing down and losing tons of business. How about this Dougies--make better food, lower your damn prices, and clean the place up a bit, then maybe ill come back to you guys...Maybe next year, the concert organizers can figure out a way to make it less lame and bring in more kosher stands.

Cool jews at the israel day parade

Im excited about the Israeli day parade and concert this weekend. Probably not for the same reason as most people. You know the love of Israel and the love of Jews. Well actually I do love Jews. I love seeing all different kinds of us folks. All year round, all I see are the regular Flatbush and boro parker roaming the streets. But they all look exactly the same; they all dress the same, act the same, work in the same profession. Once a year, I can see the rest of us. And we are such a diverse bunch, makes me wonder again, why I am still in living Brooklyn. It can also make me wonder why the girls are so much hotter outside of Brooklyn. It is also the time to wonder and ramble to oneself while the groups are marching, “who the hell knew there were that many jew folks out from long island or new jersey”. What always amazes me, of how Brooklyn in the minority on this day. For some reason the Jews from the suburbs look less jewish, more assimilated, than those within city limits. One of my favorite parts of last year was the jewish bikers group. A huge group of these mean, yet cool looking motor cycle enthusiastics. I feel more of an American than a Jewish minority that day. We are just like them. Down with the people who say we shouldn’t be like the goyim by not acting and dressing like them.


The concert however, is fun and relaxing. Meet some old friends, old dates, but for some reason I enjoy the parade better. Maybe the speeches bore me and are long enough and opinionated enough to annoy the hell out of me. But sometimes the music is not half bad. Also, the concert seems like 1 big pick up joint. Every one is hitting on everyone. The parade, I enjoy walking block to block, seeing Jews of all ages from all over the tri state area while viewing the marching.